


These Words

by Spark_Stark



Series: To Bring You Back Home [4]
Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Autistic Spencer Reid, Awkward Conversations, Boss/Employee Relationship, M/M, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:27:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25221652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spark_Stark/pseuds/Spark_Stark
Summary: Reid and Hotch talk... sort of.
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner/Spencer Reid
Series: To Bring You Back Home [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1820395
Comments: 7
Kudos: 184





	These Words

It was a morning like any other. Spencer took the subway to the office, arriving fifteen minutes before morning briefing. Rossi, Hotch and Morgan were already settled in when he stepped out of the elevator onto the sixth floor. Morgan greeted him with his usual "Morning, Pretty Boy" from the break room.

Reid smiled at his friend and placed his messenger bag on his cluttered desk. He made a bee-line for the coffee machine in the break room where an unsugared cup of coffee waited for him. "Thanks." He said, taking the mug from Derek's hand. 

"Any idea what's up with Hotch?" Morgan asked randomly. 

Spencer paused. "What? No. Why would I know anything?" He asked quietly. He busied himself with stirring an inordinate amount of sungar into the steaming cup.

Morgan gave him a weird look and held up his hands in defence. "I just haven't seen him this happy since Jack was born." He explained. "I asked Rossi if he knew anything but he said he had no clue. You and him are pretty close." 

"We're not close." Reid denied quickly. 

His friend tried not to outright laugh at him. "You two go out for lunch like three times a week. You have jokes and you text." Morgan said, pointing out the obvious to Reid. Spencer bit his lip but didn't say anything. Morgan continued. "You're friends. Friends are close." 

Spencer tried not to outwardly show his instant relief. "Oh. Yeah, we are friends." He smiled shyly. 

"So, do you know what's up with him or?" Morgan questioned again, not trying to mask his curiosity. 

Reid shook his head. "Nope." He answered, taking a sip of his coffee. One word answers were his friend. Morgan either didn't notice or chose not to comment on Reid's peculiar behaviour, much more interested in Hotch's. 

Morgan hummed. "Rossi thinks he's getting some." He said casually. Reid, not knowing how to respond, nodded and sipped his coffee. He looked at his watch and made a gesture to the briefing room. Morgan sighed and followed him out of the break room. Spencer pulled his shirt collar a little higher up his neck. 

-

Hotch (6.47pm)  
Can we talk?

Reid saw the text and tried not to think about what it meant. He was stepping out of the subway station onto the streets of D.C when his phone chimed. Debating on whether or not to reply, he followed his normal Thursday routine. Walking towards the pizza take-away place a block from his apartment complex, he made up his mind and opened the text while he waited in line. 

Reid (6.55pm)  
sure. all ok?

Hotch (6.55pm)  
Yes.

Hotch (6.56pm)  
It's about... this. Us.

Spencer took a deep breath and stepped up in the line, ordering his usual dinner. The cashier smiled at him familiarly, he smiled back despite his inner conflict. 

Reid (6.59pm)  
ok

He waited for Hotch's response, but by the time his order was ready he still hadn't replied. He took the paper bag and left the shop, heading towards his home. He heard the text notification was he was walking up the stairs of the complex and decided to wait until he was in his apartment to open it. He followed his routine, locking the door behind him as he stepped into the apartment and placing his food on the kitchen counter. Untied his shoes, washed his hands, pouring himself a glass of water and unboxing his dinner. He hesitated for a minute and then took out his phone from his pocket. 

Hotch (7.09pm)  
Does what we are doing make you uncomfortable?

Reid (7.15pm)  
no

Reid (7.15pm)  
are you uncomfortable?

Hotch (7.16pm)  
No. I'm comfortable.

Reid (7.16pm)  
me 2

Hotch (7.18pm)  
So what do we call this?

That was a question that Reid didn't know the answer to. He wished he did. 

Reid (7.20pm)  
i don't know...

Hotch (7.21pm)  
This is just sex, right?

Reid (7.23pm)  
right. but we're friends too.

Hotch (7.23pm)  
Yes, of course we are.

Hotch (7.24pm)  
I've never done anything like this before.

Spencer felt lost, he felt trapped. He knew that his feelings for Hotch went further than friendship and sexual arousal. Even with their current situation aside, Reid was in an extremely compromised position. He couldn't admit to his feeling before and he definitely couldn't admit to them now. The question that Spencer needed to ask himself was is he willing to submit to having some but not all of what he wanted?

Reid (7.30pm)  
i know

Hotch (7.32pm)  
We're doing okay like this though.

Reid (7.32pm)  
yeah

Hotch (7.33pm)  
It's good.

Reid (7.34pm)  
really good

Hotch (7.34pm)  
Thanks for the confidence boost.

Reid (7.35pm)  
is it too late to take it back?

Hotch (7.35pm)  
Yes. You said it. I am a sex god.

Reid (7.36pm)  
ok i did NOT say that!

Hotch (7.39pm)  
We're getting off track.

Hotch (7.40pm)  
I'm okay with what we have now.

If Spencer could see Hotch at that moment, he would know that it was a lie. But Spencer himself was trying to keep it together, the apparent information that Hotch didn't want what Reid did was like a punch to the stomach. He had lost his appetite and he pushed his food away from him.

Reid (7.42pm)  
me 2

Hotch (7.45pm)  
Good.

Spencer locked his phone and stood up from his seat. He collected his unfinished dinner and brought it to the bin, cleaning up his kitchenette and making his way to the living room. He decided he wanted to dedicate his evening to reading, knowing that the familiar act would help his emotions subdue. He let himself stim, tapping his right hand against his left arm as he balanced his book against his leg and turned the page with his left hand. After half an hour, he felt less overwhelmed then he had during his conversation with Hotch.


End file.
